I posted this as a Myspace bulletin, back before Myspace was mainstream, not to mention before indie was mainstream… sell-outs.
How Indie are you?
If you answer yes to any of these questions give yourself 5 points…
( ) Were you the first person you know to hear “Last Nite” by The Strokes?
( ) Were you the first person you know to hear “Evil” by Interpol?
( ) Were you the first person you know to hear “Lazy Eye” by the Silver Sun Pickups?
( ) Were you the first person you know to hear “Naïve” by the Kooks?
( ) Were you the first person to hear any Kooks song ever?
( ) Did you know about the Kooks before they formed?
( ) Did you invent skinny jeans?
( ) Were you the first person you know to see Garden State?
( ) Zach Braff’s myspace is your homepage.
( ) Were you the first person you know to wear a scarf at a club even when it’s not cold outside?
( ) Streetparty!…. Did you just have an orgasm when you read that word?
( ) Do you believe a cardigan is a way of life?
( ) Are you so indie you’re actually massively corporate?
( ) Did you know the dinosaurs would become extinct before it happened?
( ) Did you start the trend of dinosaurs wearing Chuck Taylor All-Stars?
( ) Fuck the dinosaurs they sold out when they made a comeback 365 million years after they were supposedly dead. Fucking suits. Agree?
( ) Did you invent music?
( ) Are you the only truely Indie person in the world?
If you didn’t answer ‘yes’ to every single one of those questions you are not truely indie, so go suck on one you corporate sell-out super-suit fucking poseur.
If you did answer ‘yes’ to all of them… you’re not indie, because I already answered yes to them all first. Sell-out.